Too much on my plate

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It isn’t unusual for me to feel overwhelmed. I deal better than I once did with times like these. But they still are what they are. Overwhelming!

Much of what I’m focused on is positive. I’m becoming a Bat Mitzvah on September 29th, which is very exciting for me.

I’m also having my first significant gallery opening, towards the beginning of July. There will be live music, alcohol, and food all provided by the Galt Gallery Owner, Campbell.

I’m attending my first cousin’s weeding, at the beginning of September, too.

My parents are in town for the week, on their way to their yearly trip to Jackson Hole, Wyoming.

On the one hand, each of these occasions are potentially fun and uplifting.

But altogether, they feel like too heavy of a load.

I’ve always needed a fair amount of alone time. I’m somewhat social, but still something of an introvert.

I have not been sleeping well, or eating terrifically well, either. I’m exhausted.

It takes a lot to prepare for an art show, and even more to prepare for a Bat Mitzvah.

I don’t mean to be a complainer. I chose to do all of these things. Studying Hebrew, doing the reading the Rabbi assigns us, painting, getting ready for the show-it’s all feeling a bit heavy on my shoulders right now.

I always feel like I’m not doing as much as I should be, and that weighs on me. I need to paint all of the outside edges of my pieces, with black, wire them all, and get them to the gallery by the beginning of July. I also have to get Giclee prints made, and finish a piece that I wish to include in the show.

The Rabbi, me, and two other Temple Emek Shalom members, are studying together to prepare for our separate Bat, and Bar Mitzvah’s. Which involves a great deal of reading, learning, and stretching myself spiritually.

I will need to learn six lines of Hebrew from the book of Exodus, to read at the ceremony. I will have to write enough for about an 8 minute talk about my experiences of becoming a Bat Mitzvah, while weaving the subject matter of my Torah portion, and the holiday of Sukkot into my essay.

It’s just feeling like a lot right now, and needed to share this.

What it comes down to, is a load of worrying about doing all that needs to be done, while involving less actual doing!

Have any of you gone through cycles, or times in your lives that have been both wonderfully positive, but seemed/felt like too much to cope with? Or is it just me?

 

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2 Comments

  1. It is not just you. I’m dealing with a lot right now, and I’m having to dig deep to find gratitude that I’m getting such good healthcare instead of just getting frustrated and taking some stuff off my plate for the time being

  2. That is a lot on your plate, and I’d feel overwhelmed, too. Even if things are good things, it’s still ‘stuff’ to do and that can make you stress and panic. Most days (99%) I seem to feel as though I’m not doing enough and that I’m falling behind as my to-do list grows longer. Prioritising is easier said than done and sometimes you just don’t have the energy to know where to start. You are doing brilliantly, just take a breath. Write out what you need to do and tackle small bits, one at a time. Everything will go okay, and you’ll get everything done; feeling overwhelmed and burnt out doesn’t help anyone, it just hurts you, especially if it takes away your enjoyment of what’s going on. You’ve got this! 🙂
    Caz xx

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