The Joys of Commitment

Okay. So, I just got back from the Volcano National Park, and I’m tired. Really tired. I don’t feel like writing. I’m not even sure what to write about.

Perhaps I’ll write about making promises to myself that I keep.

Remaining committed and enthusiastic about anything I do is tough for me. I get caught up in the initial glow of any new endeavor that I am engaged in.

Inevitably, the excitement passes. I feel leaden in my body, and don’t want to do what I was once so thrilled about. I feel, God forbid, uninspired!

It seems kind of the same to me as being in a romantic relationship. At first everything is so great. I cannot wipe the smile off my face. I am full of energy and want to be with that special someone every moment.

Then time passes. I realize that not everything is so wonderful as I thought, with my new love. He in actuality can be annoying occasionally. We start to fight once and awhile, and to clash in ways that I did not expect. To keep the relationship going, there is work involved. Oh, the drudgery of it all!

On rare occasions, I am so excited by the prospect of writing that I want to do nothing else. Mostly I know that I made a serious promise to myself to write every day. Not one of the usual promises I make with myself that I discard when I’m not feeling it. Every other day won’t cut it. Maybe I could skip certain days, when I’m not feeling motivated…?

Even creativity has to be worked on, and worked with. If I wait for inspiration before I write something, or do art, I could be waiting for a long while. Sometimes the inspiration comes after I begin writing. Strange, that.

There is something to be said for persistence, and for consistency. I hate to admit this as I am such a free spirit. I much prefer to be spontaneous!

It’s not easy to stay with something you can fail at. Something you take seriously. Something that defines who you are.

That is what I’m doing now. It terrifies me, but I realize that I will get nowhere if I don’t stick to at least some of my goals. Yucky word, I know. I try not to use it.

I have hope that if I keep writing daily I might become a better writer. Maybe not a great writer, but somewhat improved. Don’t want to shoot too high, of course.

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